Perfect Stranger..

Browsed through the channel when i saw it was coming up next in HBO..quickly took my shower and settled in front of the tv. I've read the book but couldnt remember much about the story..so i thought why not watch the movie instead..after all, i'm alone again at home=(

So to speak, i enjoyed the movie very much..the similar contentment i got with Love Actually..there's something about these movie that i love watching..not the cliche' fling-and-flirt but more to chemistry and complimentary..shoot, i'm talking crap now!!*zip the mouth*

Hooked to the 6pm Chinese series on TV3..Survivor's Law..Ben vs Vincent, i go for Ben..aint that good looking but again, something about his character and the way he lead his life..errkk can i puke at my own words?? iyek!

Question: Am i being pampered at the moment? cos thats what i feel everybody's doing to me.. Ma no longer nag/scold me whenever i laze around in the morning not doing the chores and attend to all my cravings...adik's been complaining that i no longer get scolded by ma/abah but she still does,hehehe..brother who's being extra nice and thoughtful ...and Ayah Mie bought me this nice perfume. he said he bought it in june and kept it for me since so i decided to called it as an early birthday present.
err of course i'm not complaining =)

MEMO...

Never ever leave me alone at home...look what happen today when nobody's home by 9am and its raining outside...
12 pm

1.Bfast-done(not yet? ur kidding,hehehe)
2.Shower- errr aaaa hehehe (told ya:p)
3.Houhehold duties- half (quarter to be more accurate) way
4.TV-hours
5.Internet-hours
6.Cooking- erkk

and i'm feeling very sleepy after finishing my daily doses of nasi kerabu...

so mum, pls dont complain if u see me in my pyjama at this hour and the house isnt the way it is suppose to be cos i cant funtion alone..told u before rite? =D

i'm off to the living room to watch some tv (read:doze off) while waiting for others to come home...

LIFE IS GOOD

he kept me occupied for a week..tasks included kejut suruh bangun subuh..nagged suruh stop main games utk smayang n mandi..temankan tgk vcd cerita2 hantu..layan dgr lagu jiwang dia tuh n suapkan makan...yep, malas nak ber'perang' utk suruh mkn, susah sgttt..in between, sukela kacau2 dia main games, layan kelentong n loyar buruk dia..and buat dia merajuk..hahaha, ala senang jeh nak pujuk..mesti aku akan nyanyi lagu nih

kik kik koo..
nukub berah...
sikit nak suko(sikit nak suka/gelak)
suko deghah(suka/gelak kuat2)

gerenti dia akan sorok muka sbb nak hide his grin..then he complained "slalu nyanyi lagu ni..." another trick is to pretend to sulk n buat x layan..sure lps tuh dia akan datang ngendeng n buat2 baik..hahahah
oh my, i missed him so so muchhh...trase mcm ade little brother..sgt best..

**********************************************

cuti kali nih byk jumpe/terjumpa kawan lama as in kawan skola rendah..smalam pun pegi rumah kwn merangkap sedara jauh for her engagement day...rezki dapat jumpe sorang lagi kwn lama...so x payahla nak penat2 plan nak jumpe,hehehe... kwn sorang lg nih study medic kat HUSM n been keeping in touch with her once in a while..catched up with things n planned to meet up again...haih, duduk umah nih mmg patah kaki..nak kuar malas unless dgn parents or betul2 ade hal...ikutkan ade la sorang dua kwn kat sini yg nak jumpe tp ntah tak terplan2 lagi..mase b4 balik mmgla bukan main lg ckp nak jumpe tp bile kat rumah nih, occupied dgn household chores campur malas..heheh

kedah's trip was good...spent time with my sooo-pampered-preggy sister..since abg K keje so xdela jln2 sgt..tp mkn sgt byk...x sempat lapar dah makan balik..hahah..lawak abah yg paling best

"hmm kalu panggil abg K jadik kuda la"

"eh, bakpo(apsal) pulak abah?"

"yelah, abg D dah ade..abg U dah ade..abg ngah dulu2 org panggil E"

"lol"

pastu tgk cite indon nih, kiamat sudah dekat...best jugakk cos klakar tp ade mesej yg sgt bagus...

i'm expecting more fun nx week..2 weddings of seri puter!'s CF (college fren) and junior m0nash..ikutkan ade 2 invitation for the same date..M(housemate) punye akak n Al!za, my CF mase kat skola...at first mmg ingatkan akan miss Al!za's wedding cos dpt invitation from M lagi awal n wedding akak dia pun kat klantan so senangla...tp pk2 balik, this is the only chance to meet up my other SSP frens cos skang sume dah bz n ade commitment lain..last2 decided to go to Aliza's, last mins confirmed and really looking forward for that..plus insya Allah will be staying over at L!yana's place after the function..wheeeeeeee!! another one is Ana, my Monash junior..hopefully dpt pegi and jumpe other ppl jugak..sure byk gossip aaa=p..sume2 nih insya Allahhhhh kalu xde halangan...hmm, dua2 yg nak kawen nih ade Yasm!n kat blakang nama diiorg..errr relevant tak nak tulis kat sini,hehehe...

alhamdulillah, i thank HIM for all this

in the middle of serious(exaggerated ok:p)discussion with on!e...lotsa things happening around..will write soon..

WHAT U GIVE...U GET BACK...(heheheh)




err dont puke:p
to be honest..i dearly miss him=(

i dunno..maybe i'm living in denial...maybe its all rumours and nothing's actually gonna happen..at this point, ignorance is a bliss for me...i cant take it for any reason, even to think of the possibilities for it to happen make me feel sick..the only strength i have now are my little prayers and those who's been there for me...otherwise,God knows what would happen to me..
needless to say, at the same time i learnt the invaluable hikmahs behind it...tho i might be living in insecurities and fear for all my life thinking and worrying about this, i'll keep on praying for the good thing..silent prayers sent to me, very much appreciated=)

on another note, i'll be visiting my preggie sis in kedah tomorrow..spend a few days there...then back home before going to kl ..so peon, see u at the wedding reception(syhhhh tau!!) and hani-izhar, msgkan contact no in msia so that we can plan up something..anything, i'm using the old 017...

cos of the news/rumours this morning, my hols came to its end.damn sad and confused. tears couldnt find their way and i couldnt bring myself to look into the eyes. not hatred but i wish i never got asked about it. SIGH. i hate to be noble and i hate to pretend..i am one hell of selfish and if this news is to be true, i am damned for life.

life has been really really good to me for the past week. wish i've written the experiences earlier so that it'll be full of joy and contentment. staying home and caring for the 3 lil boys of nephew and cousins...balik kg, met the old folks, played with lil cousins and ate my fav dish...reunited with my childhood fren whom i last saw in form 3 and just got married last saturday, catched up with things.all breeze for me. life was soooooo perfect that last nite, i thot it couldnt be true. life couldnt be this smooth and there need to be something bad. just when i thot, it then happened..

i soo wanna erase the conversation. i soooo wanna be invisible. i soooo wanna pour it all. but the decision isnt mine tho. no matter how much i hate it, it still can happen and i'll be damned for life.

quiet.

Captured...

'syakir nak ape cik N balik nih?'
'gambar steven gerrard ade?'
'erkkk, adui'
twice i got the same reply..printing the pics from internet wasnt so appealing so i ended up buying a football mags with gerrard mini poster..he's at the airport when i arrived and the next day, i gave him the mags..pleased to see the happy face and how excitedly he flipped thru the pages, shared his idea about soccer with his Tok Ayah (my Ayah Mie)..later he came up to me
'thank you'
'eh for what?'
'for this'*sheepish smile*
heeeee...

********
uptown girl..she's been living in an uptown world...
as far as i can remember, he' been into this song since 4 years old. at that time, he would bug me to play the song on the computer and hum along. this summer, its this same song he excitedly asked me about and play it again and again on the computer.

********
'jom syakir, esok kite lawan main games''
heheh, nak main game ape?''
hmmm, football la''reti ke??' *chehh*
'eeee retilaaa..nti cik N kalahkan syakir,haaaaaa;p'
'okk'
after 1 mins and he's leading by 1 goal, he asked my cousin to take over me..huwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!
*******
'murah je nih ma..'
'nih berapa nih kalu duit kite?'
'hmmm, **rm..'
'uhhhh, mahalnye..comel, knapa beli satu jeh?'
'aikk ma, tadi kata mahal pastu tanye apsal beli satu..haahhaaha, mane satu nih?'
*******
'ape dia ma?'
'esok ma abah raya, dah habis pose...kita celebratelaa masak laksa penang..pagi tuh nasi lemak'
'YEAYYYYYYYY!!'
*******
11 am...
'cik N, syakir nak tgk cite hantu'
'cite ape? cite hantu hindustan nak?'
'hmmm, x kisahla..'
aku belek2 vcd
'haaa, syakir cite hantu jepun nak? Ju-On..'
'takut ke?'
'hehe, x tahu..cik N pun x tgk lg''
bolehlaa, mane selimut?''
'hahahahaahahh, takutla tuhh..tuh ade selimut..amik cik N satu'

later,
'haaa cik N x tgk,takutla tuhh!!'

'mmgla cik N takut...nak tgk sebelah mata jeh'

i would trade the world to be home...

not another drama queen episode...

you are right. i was the one who gave up on things without knowing ur reasons. and may i add that i was the one who created arguments and made big fuss over stuff. so its actually me who is troublesome, never knows how to appreciate things and ignorant over other ppl's concerns and probs. i've been selfish all this while and i'm so ashamed of myself.never would i know that being straightforward can actually mislead because wrongly used words and end up accusing u harshly. put the blame on me coz i make u feel not good enough for a frenship.wish i could say more than sorry..

if u are to hate me for this, i understand.i failed to be a good fren.before i stop, there are things i'd like to thank u; for being there to cheer me up whenever i'm feeling down, for putting up with my temperamental attitude and never complain and for trying to do good to me. life would never be the same then...

NUMB...

no matter how much i regret over my doings, the damage is done...i learnt the lessons in hard way...sigh

for that, i deserved to be blamed and hated =|

TONITE...

is my last nite in melbourne before flying home for summer hols insya Allah..looking back, this is the most ENRICHING year so far and i can proudly say that i'm a SURVIVOR in the journey..those who's been reading this for the past year would have the idea why i said that..quoted from A,how time flies fast this year and franskston is now history to me..what started as resented placement had filled me with great satisfaction and sweet memories..

yes, there were a lot of trying times and emotional breakdown was part of the viscious cycle..up to a point, i almost lost grip=( but there were always be someone around the globe who reminded me that never would i be alone in this journey..and i couldnt thank them enough..and Allah will never test HIS servant for nothing..

throughout, i metamorphed..mistakes learnt, flaws accepted, people appreciated and to HIM i surrender myself...no matter how trying time it is, i managed to survive,alhamdulillahh..

i know i've hurt a lot of ppl for my bad temper and ignorant..egoist i can be but deep inside, guilty conscience wins its way..


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


i owe my great time in frankston especially to these 3 blokes..for all their non-judgemental respect, charming smile, brotherly concern and dogdy-but-laughable jokes i will miss them..

also to all the tutors: Serpell, Langton, Botha, Russell, CLeves, O'Donnell, Wassertheil, Fiddes..thank you so much!

p/s..pls pray for my safe journey..anything, reach me through my no.

Rescue 999!!!

erkkk yelppp!!..used to have my mum backk home for the past 2 years and M has been helping me to do it (she did 90% of the task actually) when she's around this year..now that M is already in msia, nobody's gonna be there me this time..no, i'm not trying to be bossy but i do have probs with it..yeah, i did try but things usually wont fit in all and when its time to unload, they will be all over the place, huwaa!! thats why i prefer ma or M to do it for me..neat n spacious..
this morning, started to sort things out, which and where..end up with piles of stuff on the bed and an empty bag..huhuhu, i grumbled to myself a few times and hopelessly looked at the bag. urgh, i dont mind spring cleaning the closet and drawers but ..what should i do next??

Z: mcm nih...ko masukkan dulu brg2 nak bawak balik dlm beg..
Y: laaa, cemana?? xkan nak campak2 jeh?
Z: xdela..ko masukkan jehla dulu...pastu letak tepi..then dah abis kemas yg kat umah nih susunla balik benda dlm beg tuh..
Z: ohhhhhhhh....

grrr, wonder how did i survive my years in ser! puter! and KMB doing this for every hols?? isk!

B!C RUNGA-courtesy of Onie

She left on a Monday
She's a siren down the road
In your herringbone overcoat
That you don't expect to get back

And it's an ordinary sky
Today's like any other day
When all of the aeroplanes
Write her name in the clouds

And nothing's wrong
But it's already Sunday
And you know just how Sunday
Was the day that she would come around?

Go to her foolish man
What's the use of having pride if you don't have her?
She'll endure all she can
But you could make this easier on her

It's all like sinking
You're trying to stay afloat
Like a wind blown paper boat
Over uncharted sea

There's no question why
You're driving to kill some time
Racing the power lines
Back into town

Go to her foolish man
What's the use of having pride if you don't have her?
She'll endure all she can
But you could make this easier on her

Go to her foolish man
What's the use of having pride if you don't have her?
She'll endure all she can
But you could make this easier on her
Make this easier on her
Make this easier on her
Make this easier on her

p/s..nice song..go listen

=)

alhamdulillah, i'm done with the OSCE exam...woke up with throbbing pain on my head,thought that i would screw up if the exam was in the morning..tried to sleep on the pain again and soaked my head with water (mum's tips)..then had my breakfast and took some painkillers..alhamdulillah, by the time to go to CMHSE, the pain wasnt as bad...

12 stations of 8 mins each...i'm not really at my top spirit to perform..just wanna get it over with..again, Allah helped me A LOT..solace and guidance..HE didnt put me in panic situation that i can think well and answer the questions as best as i can. also, the examiners' were nice and not of the stern-looking-faces-that-freaks-me-out...i know i may not be doing as thoroughly as its supposed to be, but thats the best i can do..and i have faith in Allah...

now, apart from praying hard for the results, i'm gonna occupy myself with
-my mates here. laze around, go out and cherish our time
-updates on the fotopages for raya pics
-spring cleaning of the house and wardrobe
-shopping spree
-do a checklist;)

ok, gonna make a lil announcement...teng teng teng!


i'm going back to msia this 28hb..wheeeeee!! special shout out to
hani-izhar:weh, balik christmas kan? jumpa yok!!
peon:yeay, bolehlepak dgn ko lagi..harituh kejap sgt laa;)
peah: i know u care about me..so u wont nag me for this, rite?? *muka sememeh minta dikasihani*

erkkk, do i hear someone screaming my name out loud?? better run and hide myself =p

HEADACHE

I dont know why but seems like i've been suffering from this pain for a few times lately. its not the usual headache that self-limiting. ok, this one may not be as bad as the last time but it still bother me coz it HURTS...how to describe the pain?

'rasa macam ade angin dlm kepala..berdenyut gile...everytime stand up or bendkan kepala..otak macam disqueeze byk2 kali...badan akan seram sejuk..kekadang rasa macam ade ruang kosong dlm skull...mmg akan demam kalu biar jeh sakit tuh..'

it could be the heat of summer...it could be the late meals...it could be the pressure..it could be anything

biarlahh...

HOW WAS IT?

the questions were..how should i say..tough and tricky??. couldnt think of any other words that better described the written exam this morning...why?
- it was an extended multiple-choice questions (EMQ) where we had a cluster of questions with a long list of possible answers.some of the choices given were up to X or Y..so you really have to choose the BEST answer for each scenarios..and mind you, the descriptions were very much similar to each other.even if they were not, we still need to think hard for the obscure ones..jargon? countless=(
- it tested our knowledge for the WHOLE year..and studying the integrated system of medicine means we've got every possible things to be asked in the exam..if this question was on clinical, the next one might be on pathology..and the next one? pharmacology..huhuh..and for this time around, we had whole lot of surgical and medical rotation to cover..yes, u can argue that we've much less exam period (like this time it was only a week) but the pressure? triple if not quadriple..
- personally, this exam was no more about how much we can memorise things but rather tested ur understanding on the particular topic. we can no longer rely on the basic knowledge about this illness and its clinical presentation but of how it happen and every details bits of everything..tough? u bet..
- yes, we know that there'll be a lot of past years' from the experiences but sadly, we dont get hold of the papers. so no matter how much we listen to the seniors about which topic to focus on,it will still be very broad..and yes, this is the only written exam that carry marks for our 3rd year final assesment *sigh*...

having said all that,i've given my best shot for this exam. eventho there's minor panic attack last saturday coz i was behind my revision plan and some nagging thought at the back of my head,alhamdulillah i managed to get it over with. i owed it to the short meaningful sms replies from my families and good wishes from other ppl. but most importantly is the Al-Mighty.Allah helps me to pull this thru with HIS endless guidance and bestowed me with solace before and while doing the exam...alhamdulillahh. things wouldnt be the same without HIM by my side. berkat doa parents n semua yang lain;) as quoted from abg ngah' 50% dari ape yg ngah dapat sekarang nih daripada ma dan abah' and i felt the same way too..all in all, done my best so its time to pray and tawakkal..

exam habit? for as long as i can remember, i never fancy any discussion outside the exam hall...before sitting for the paper, i prefer to sit alone at a corner than joining the crowd to avoid unnecessary panic attack..and after the exam? its already done so no point in going over it again i reckon..so i'd leave the place as quietly as possible. another habit would be the uncompromised sleep. yep, i can let go of my meals (not that often tho:p) and leisure things but not this one. my brain stop ticking after midnite. sometimes i do feel that i'm disadvantage from extra study hours but i've no complaint for this=)

post-entry
i had nightmate about the paper last nite...urghhh!!

NICE LITTLE BREAK

40 mins on the phone with him was really nothing. we talked like nobody's bussiness. started off with him asking about my return, rambling about this movies and that games.... i teased him when i asked whether he has any gf. its funny how he sheepishly changed the expression from 'kawan baik perempuan' to 'kawannn' and i laughed hard by then. next was the AF gossips...i dont have any idea how he managed to know a lot about it, seriously.. then he amused me with his passion about football, chanted a few names that i wouldnt know..recited the www dot liverpoolfc dot com thingy when i asked about his steven gerrard..haihhh, he's way too errr young for that *geleng kepala*..

we day-dreamed if we ever have the chance to travel to UK or london, as he put it;) him chasing the photograph of the soccer players and me going shopping..lalala would be fun!! "nanti kalu sesat macam mana?" "alaaa, syakir kan pandai cakap omputeh.u can ask for direction"..

and i took the chance to tease him(again!) about the food he can't take after his 'big event'..
"aaaaaaaaaa, brape lama xleh makan tuh??"

ohh, i love my 8-year-old-nephew xoxo

FINAL EXAM CHECK LIST

21st nov- Written exam (they pull a year of syllabus into this ONE freaking paper *pengsan*)

24th nov-OSCE

Ya Allah, we seek for your guidance...

till then, take care and pls pray for our success *hugs*

WHEN PICTURE SPEAKS A THOUSAND WORDS

Eid prayer, Monash sports centre

ready, not?

at kak sajar's

at kak azie's

on the way to moriah's st

third year meddies clan-evelyn st

gossip corner:p -evelyn st

fourth year clan-evelyn st


weeeeeeee, ribena-berry girls

at hafiz & k syaja's

maybe i should tune in to exam mode now..haihhhhhh =(

CHERISHED...

more piccies to come=)